3 Simple Strategies To Live A Life Of Gratitude

The single greatest thing you can do to change your life today would be to start being grateful for what you have right now.

And the more grateful you are, the more you get.”
- Oprah

A year ago we started a dinner-time game in our house, it’s called the “Gratitude Game.” Willow, my almost 5 year old, freaking loves it and begs to play each night.

It started one week when Dustin had been working late nights, it was raining non-stop, and I was feeling lonely and a little deflated. Willow was also feeling out of sorts. I was thinking to myself that it’s up to me to teach her about feelings (which I do) but also tools to get us out of a funk. So, I told Willow how I was feeling a little sad and I wanted to play a game to help me be in a better mood.

Over our dinner we then took turns sharing what we were grateful for. Each time it was Willow’s turn she would get more and more excited, sharing all the wonderful and amazing things in her life. Expressing gratitude for her mum and dad, friends, kinder teachers and playing at the beach everyday. And Sage? Well, she was grateful for “boobies” (haha!).

Gratitude is the simplest and most effective way to change the way we feel. And it’s a beautiful way to show kindness to yourself too. Sometimes it’s hard to feel gratitude… But the more you practice it, the easier it becomes and the lighter you will feel.

I’ve noticed a pattern.

When I begin to feel down in the dumps, or fearful, or angry, or anything really that is negative- I see how my thoughts have slipped away from gratitude. As soon as I notice this, I’m able to stop myself, breathe for a moment and turn my thinking and heart back to all the goodness that is in my life.

Here are 3 simple strategies you could use to live a life of gratitude:

1) Try playing the “Gratitude Game” with your family and friends at the dinner table. It makes for good conversation and it really does uplift the mood in the room.

2) Keep a “Gratitude Journal”. I find this is quite effective when I am really REALLY down. There’s something about putting pen to paper and being able to read back on the blessings that are in your life.

3) Start small. It’s not always easy to find things to be grateful for when you feel like your life has hit rock bottom. But trust me, no matter who you are, where you are, or what your life circumstances is- there is always something we can be thankful for. Whether it’s being grateful for watching the sun rise after a difficult sleepless night. Or the food that you have to eat, no matter how big or small. Maybe it’s being able to hear the song of a bird while you go for your walk.

When you start with the small things, your world will begin to open up to the other blessings surrounding you, and before you know it you’ll have a long list of things to be grateful for.

So, what are you grateful for?

Empaths and Introverts- it's okay to ask for help too.

“The deepest pain I ever felt was denying my own feelings to make everyone else comfortable.”

Nicole Lyons

The thing about introverts is, we generally internalise our pain because we don’t want to be a “bother” on people. Always the empath, we listen to other people, and we are there for them- but when it comes to communicating how we are, or if we need help with anything (whether big or small) it takes a lot for us to speak out.

I remember when I was at the park with the girls, and my littlest was having a big melt down. She didn’t want to be consoled, and was rolling around in the dirt. So I went down on my knees to try and comfort her and pick her up. Not realising the large branch directly above my head, I stood up quickly and smashed my head fairly hard. Things went blank for a split second, and I sat there feeling dazed and confused. Sage was crying at my feet, but I just kind of stared into nothing. My friends were there, but I honestly had thoughts of “I don’t want to be a bother.” Thankfully, after about 5 minutes, my friend noticed and I told her what happened. Immediately she came to my aid and sat with me until my dizziness and confusion eased.


Afterwards, I was thinking about all the times in my life where I just sit… and wait… Not speaking up, because I don’t want to put another person out. I thought about how someone recently said to me that sometimes we can disguise doing acts of kindness on others, to deflect the fact that we aren’t kind to ourselves.

So, I’m trying.

Trying to be kinder, and a little more “selfish”… Because, perhaps, asking for help isn’t actually selfishness- but a form of kindness to ourselves.

I guess, my dear empathetic introvert reader, I want you to check in with yourself. I imagine that during this pandemic time, you are reaching out to your loved ones. Making sure they’re okay, being a support for them, offering to ease their emotional burdens. Perhaps you have some extroverted friends that are finding this time of social distancing and isolation extremely hard- and you’re worried. Worried for them. Worried for others. Worried about what is going to come and what will happen.

But please, don’t forget to look after yourself too. If you’re finding this hard, and you need some help- it’s okay to reach out. We don’t always need to be the strong ones. We don’t always need to be the ones that have it together. Be there for your friends, but if you also need your friends there for you- ask. Find your people. Get support. Call phone counselling if you need. Whatever it is that you do- be kind to yourself and know that you’re not a bother.